One way that parents of able-bodied and disabled kids are alike, is that they are terrified of the day their child starts school. From birth until the age of three, your child has been in a bubble that you've created. Their routine consists of napping, watching television, eating three meals a day, and more napping. They've been under you and your spouse's watch the whole time; even when you're out in public they're in your grasp. Any incidents that have occurred have been scary but always manageable because one of you has been there to resolve it; now that is about to change.
I don't need to go into detail about how you might be feeling. You know. What I will do is give some tips on how you can get past this fear and make your child's transition into the world of education smooth. Let's go!
1. Get a note from your child's doctors and therapists documenting their needs: Before your child begins school you need to know what his or her needs are. Does your child have a learning disability? What help will he or she need to accommodate it? What limitations could a physical disability cause in a school setting? How can those limitations be catered to?
These are all important questions to find the answers to because you'll have to share this information with school faculty and administrators. They need to know what strengths and weaknesses your child has as a result of his or her disability so that they can provide the best services to him or her. Of course, you need to know your child's strengths and weaknesses too because you're their parent; you shouldn't be caught off-guard.
2. Visit the school prior to the start-date: Scheduling a personal visit in order to share information about your child's condition with teachers, principals, and administrators as well as to get more information about the school district and its services is a good idea. You and your spouse will need a closer look at the ins-and-outs of the school to make sure it can cater to your child's needs. If there are issues, address them.
(Side note: If there are other parents of disabled children in the district, reach out to them. They'll give you an unbiased opinion of the district and might share tips for getting through the year.)
When meeting with the district administration as well as school faculty members tell them about your child's condition but also about your child. Who are they as a person? They need to know your child first and the disability second. They are teaching your child. They are not teaching the disability.
And oh yeah, when attending any school meetings about your child......
3. Attend All School Meetings With Someone: This is a general rule for just about any significant meeting regarding your child whether it be at an IEP meeting or a doctor's appointment. According to Spokane Community College, human beings only retain about half of all information given to them on a daily basis. As days and weeks go by, we slowly forget the information. This is a problem when it comes to making decisions regarding your child and when taking in sensitive information.
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| Courtesy of Speech and Language Kids |
(Side Note: Your spouse is always the number one choice but if they can't make it to the meeting invite someone who's a good listener and that you trust to come along.
(Side note #2: You can't just request Individualized Education Plans. You need to first get the note from your doctor detailing your child's condition. Then, the school has to set up a play-based assessment which is just as it sounds; I'll post a link about what the assessment entails below. Only then will the school get your child set up with an IEP.)
4. Correspond through journaling with your child's paraprofessional or teacher: Surprisingly, this is a perfectly acceptable, non-helicopter parenting, action. Like I said, those on your child's educational team are going to be constantly observing your child, directly or indirectly. Since this is always occurring there is no reason for you to be blindsided come IEP time.
To stay in-the-loop, this journal will be a source of communication between you and your child's educational team. The communication should be focused on any problems that your child has on a day-to-day basis in the classroom--usually of a behavioral or medical nature but it can also focus on academics. For example, if your kid didn't sleep well the previous night, let their aide know so that exhaustion is not mistaken for a bigger problem that needs to be addressed.
And now a couple of tips about the finer points of education: friends and field trips.
5. Go in and talk to the class prior to your child beginning school there: Elementary-aged kids are lucky enough to not be judgmental jerks. Of course, they're still kids and any difference between them and their classmates will spark their curiosity. You don't want your child to be bombarded with questions about their disability within their first weeks of school so, if the school allows it, go ahead and speak to your child's class about his or her disability. Answer any questions they may have about your child's condition so, your child can focus on making friends without a barrier between them and their classmates.
(Side note: Obviously, don't do this with your child's knowledge. Your child shouldn't even be there on the day that you do it.)
6. If a field trip is coming up, make sure your child can go on it: Although it may seem that the school has everything figured out in regards to your child; they forget stuff. For example, in fifth grade, I went on a field trip to Midewin National Park in Wilmington, Illinois. I was told it had an accessible pathway. 3 hours later, my dad and I were exhausted from walking through wheat fields and rocky terrain.
No matter the disability, the field trip should be accessible to your child and the school needs to be held accountable for making sure your kid can go on it. Any problems that may arise in planning the trip need to be brought to you and your spouse's attention.
If your child is physically disabled make sure the school has gotten a handicap bus. If your child's class is going to see a show but, your child has autism and doesn't like loud noises, pack a pair of headphones in his or her backpack. Just inform his or her aide that the headphones are there.
Also, any faculty on that field trip is responsible for your child. Make sure they know that. Your child deserves to enjoy the finer points of education as any other kid.
(Side Note: If your kid is physically handicapped, see if your kid can invite kids on the bus with him or her. No need for your kid to be separated from their classmates if they don't have to be.)
(Side Note #2: In the instance that the school just cannot accommodate your child on a particular field trip, pull them out of school that day and take them somewhere special.)
And for one of the most important tips, I can give you...
7. At the end of your child's school year, write a thank-you email:
Your child will have a lot of ups-and-downs throughout the year. However, as long as the school is doing right by him or her, everyone involved in your kid's success deserves a thank-you. A lot of correspondence between you and your child's school will be about the problems your child faces. This doesn't mean that the school isn't doing their job or that your kid is doomed. The problems are simply more important to address right away.
However, once summer break comes along, it is time to push all the problems aside and show gratitude. After all, without the help of the special education department and your child's teachers, your child wouldn't have made it this far.
Well, that's all for this week. As always, comment if you like what you've read and if you don't; comment and help me improve! Talk to ya later.
P.S. Here's the link detailing play-based assessments: http://speech-language-pathology-audiology.advanceweb.com/Article/The-Power-of-Play-Based-Assessment-2.aspx
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